Scorched Earth
THE GUARDIAN
Istanbul Press Office Statement
As Reported by Jonathan Dyers, Guardian Staff Correspondent
“Inon Fogulu, Turkish Minister of Press Affairs reported today that Police in Instanbul have discovered the dead body of Anstos Urbos, Metropolitan of the famous Monastery of Saint Panteleimon on Mt. Athos, known throughout history as “The Rossikon”. This Russian Orthodox Monastery dates back to Keivan Rus in the 11th Century and was presided over by Metropolitan Urbos for the past ten years.
Police found the body of Metropolitan Urbos in an alleyway in the waterfront district of Istanbul and it appears that he was tortured before he was killed. Metropolitan Urbos was reported missing by members of his staff when he did not appear at Holy Liturgy during the Interfaith Synod of Orthodox Churches Conference yesterday.
His All-Holiness Ecumenical Patriarch Bartholomew, Head of the Greek Orthodox Church of Constantinople and Patriarch Kirill, Orthodox Patriarch of Moscow and All Rus, issued a joint statement mourning the loss of Metropolitan Urbos and directing all Orthodox Churches to hold a prayer vigil for his soul.
Police Authorities in Istanbul are continuing their investigation of this violent homicide and will be providing updates to the press as events unfold.
Jonathan Dyers, Reporting from Istanbul.
Paulus Hook Bound
Hyne and his team land at Morristown Airport so they can get to Warren Township quickly. They’re met by a trusted wheelman they’ve used in the past – a friend of Peter Xiang-Li – who drives them up Routes 287 and 78 like the devil himself is chasing them.
Hyne doesn’t know it, but at that very moment Xiang-Li is huddled down low in the back seat of his cousin Sin-Sha’s Toyota Corolla. They ‘ve spent the whole night shaking from fear in the back of her Nail Salon and now – in the sunlight – feel brave enough to venture out. He leaves his Mercedes in the back of her Nail Salon on Mountain Avenue in case somebody is still looking for him. His telltale New Jersey license plates – “Xiang” – don’t exactly help him disappear into a random traffic flow. But now he’s got to confirm his intuition about last night’s insane assault on his office.
Sin-Sha drives towards Hyne’s ranch house on Vosseller Avenue in Martinsville to catch a look at it in the daylight. Xiang-Li is certain that the goons who tore apart his office and probably killed his office-cleaner, Costanza, have by now ransacked Hyne’s residence, too. But in a few minutes, he sees things are a lot worse than he expected.
Fire engines line Vosseller Avenue and police are redirecting traffic away from the site. Acrid smoke still curls out of the completely charred house that has now been reduced to a few collapsing sections of smoldering two-by-four wall studs. The place is a complete loss. It’s burned down to the dirt. And there’s a burned-out Ford Explorer in the driveway.
“Holy shit….keep driving” he tells Sin-Shen.
They head down Washington Valley Road to a residential street a few blocks down and double back to Warren Township. He’s got to get inside his office and survey the damage – and then deal with Costanza’s body. If he can “smoke” Hyne’s computer files before the Warren Police get there, it’ll just be treated as a breaking-and-entering gone bad. After he hits that magic encrypted key code, the police can rifle through his computer all they want. He’ll trigger a “Doomsday Dump” – a delete sweep – and Hyne’s information will thereafter be in the ozone. Police probably will assume Costanza surprised the thieves as they ransacked the joint while looking for drug money. Mt. Horeb Road feeds right into Mountain Avenue and Washington Valley Road from Route 22 – bad actors from the Plainfield’s and Bound Brook are always making their way up the side of the mountain to get to Warren and Martinsville. In their eyes, it’s where the “rich people” live. Carjacking, home break-ins and petty theft are common “up the hill” pastimes for these budding criminals.
Xiang-Li has Sin-Shen drop him off down the block from his office at the True-Value Hardware store and walks the rest of the way.
His building front door is split down the center and barely hanging on its hinges. He pushes his way through and makes his way upstairs to where his office suit is. The staircase is littered with trash, and the bannister is broken off. The door to his office is ajar. He pushes it inward but feels resistance.
Xiang-Li pushes harder, forcing open a space he can squeeze through – then he sees what is blocking his way.
Costanza’s body is crumpled up behind the door. Her neck is obviously broken – cocked at an unnatural forty-five-degree angle with neck bones protruding outwards – and there’s blood pooling all around her from two large gaping holes in her throat. Flies are starting to nest in the wounds, and the smell is already nauseating.
Xiang-Li quickly turns his face and pukes on the floor.
As he wipes his mouth with his shirt sleeve, he becomes aware of something next to him. He spins in a panic, tripping over an overturned chair and almost slamming his head against a file cabinet.
Then he recognizes the voice.
“Hello, old friend.”
Hyne extends his hand to help his lawyer up off the floor. His grip is firm and his face allows Xiang-Li to breathe easier for the first time in twelve hours. Three more men are in the room – everyone is in dark, tactical clothing, lurking in shadows. Hyne is hooded.
“I’ve already seen what’s happened at Vosseller Avenue. My home there is a total loss. We’ve got a Gulfstream waiting at Morristown Airport and are heading back to Cyprus after we clean up a few things down in the Pine Barrens. You’re welcome to come with us.”
A voice comes from the back of the room.
“Captain…”
It’s Per L’Enfant. He emerges from the back of the room with Xen Chen and Dirk Fremd.
“Captain, The Guardian just broke a story about some Metropolitan in charge of that Orthodox Monastery you were rehabilitating at on Mt. Athos.…he’s been murdered in Istanbul. Looks like he was tortured like Father Dimitrios in Jersey City. This attack on Xiang-Li was to get to you – the breadcrumbs lead from Father Dimitrios in Jersey City to Xiang-Li… And Metropolitan Urbos being murdered in Istanbul leads straight to Cyprus.
Vampyres are tracking you. They know you’re Hyne. And even Cyprus is no longer safe – it’s probably burning now as we speak. It’s good you sent Lee and Arkan away…but we got nowhere to go, Cap! We need a base of operations. We need a fortress.”
Hyne takes a minute to digest what Per L’Enfant just said. His Martinsville house in New Jersey is ashes. His Cyprus beach complex is compromised – and probably gone – because Metropolitan Urbos would have served up his Cyprus address long before the Vampyres killed him. There’s no way he couldn’t have withstood their vicious “persuasions..”
“I guess we’re gonna’ live in a tent in the Pine Barrens, boys…” Hyne says.
For Xiang-Li, Hyne’s comment is the last straw. He’s had enough. It’s time for a Chinese shit fit. The exhausted lawyer is at his wits end. He throws up his arms and in classic New Jersey fashion “tears Hyne a new butthole”.
“JUST WAIT A GODDAMN MINUTE!! DON’T YOU READ MY MONTHLY REPORTS AT ALL?? I REPRESENT YOU FOR CHRIST’S SAKE!! DON’T YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT YOUR ASSETS OR WHAT I’VE BEEN DOING FOR THE PAST FRIGGIN’ YEAR?? I’VE BEEN WORKING MY ASS OFF FOR YOU AND YOU NEVER SO MUCH AS GIVE ME A GODDAMN COMPLIMENT – OR EVEN READ THE SHIT I PREPARE FOR YOU!! DO YOU HAVE ANY FRIGGIN’ IDEA HOW MUCH MONEY YOU HAVE???
Xiang-Li’s face is red and his hands are shaking. He’s tired and pissed off, hovering over the dead body of his office housekeeper. Three – God knows what – creatures came hunting for him last night to make him sing information about Hyne – and then silence him, for certain. And he’s still in danger.
“I’M A LAWYER, GODDAMN IT – NOT JAMES BOND. THANKS FOR PAYING MY LEGAL BILLS BUT – LOOK AT ME!! I’M FIVE FEET FIVE INCHES AND ONE HUNDRED FIFTEEN POUNDS SOAKING WET!! DO I LOOK LIKE I CAN ROLL WITH THIS SHIT??”
Hyne reaches out to his friend and touches his arm. He sees how he’s taken his cherished friend for granted. The man is at the end of his rope. If their friendship means anything, this is the moment he must show it.
“I’m so sorry, Xiang. Please forgive me.”
Xen Chen, Dirk Fremd and Per L’Enfant are just standing there with their mouths open. This guy just told their Captain where to get off…talk about big brass ones!
Xiang-Li collects himself and starts rubbing his temples, obviously deep in thought. He holds up his hand – he ain’t finished.
“Alright. You need solutions. I got what you need.
When I picked up the steamer trunks-full of files from Sullivan & Cromwell – the actual documents of Simon Magus’ Estate – there were tons of surprises. I’ve spent the past year divesting real estate assets he owned around the world – Rome, Athens, Istanbul, Reykjavik, Cairo and Paris. These were signature investment properties worth hundreds of millions of dollars and generating significant rental income – but I divested them all and bought gold – like you wanted me to.
There are certain properties, however, I haven’t gotten around to liquidating. All in the United States. All in New Jersey. There are three luxury 54th-floor condominiums – four bedrooms, three baths – in the prestigious Exchange Place Tower in Jersey City. Vacant. Each condo is worth between fifteen and seventeen Million US dollars. The keys are in my sister’s nail salon safe across the street.
But – like it or not – we’re joined at the hip. I come with this package deal now! You’ve gotten me involved in some deep shit. After last night, I’m obviously a marked man in Warren Township. You gotta’ keep me alive. It helps me – and it helps you. Fact is, me only getting long-distance access to you isn’t working any more. Your affairs are too complex – and you need me close by. That’s why this next property is our answer. Hands down.
THIS IS THE CROWN JEWEL!!
Before he died, Simon Magus deeded a large property at Paulus Hook in Jersey City to the Greek Orthodox Archdiocese of New York and New Jersey. They refused it – they tore up the deed. They had their lawyer advise Sullivan & Cromwell in New York that “…the property is too expensive to maintain and not appropriate for the mission of an ecclesiastical institution”. In confidence, a Sullivan & Cromwell lawyer told me that the Greek Orthodox Church actually believed the property was “a site where blasphemous rituals were conducted – a place tainted by sin” and wanted no part of it.
“Sin” my ass! I actually went there to walk through it. It’s magnificent!
It’s on the corner of Essex and Hudson Streets on Paulus Hook – a completely renovated multi-story commercial and residential complex that is assessed by the Jersey City Tax Office at $137.5 Million dollars!
This property is ideal bunker and lodge for you and your family. It’s close to Manhattan – and includes a connected, city-block-sized, deep boat house at what used to be the old Paulus Hook Marina right next door. Water navigation rights and full access to the Hudson River are included in the title. The place has a private library, a commercial grade kitchen, gymnasium, tech center, roof-top helicopter pad and deck. The walls are two feet thick, hundred-year-old brick with bullet-proof and self-tinting window glass. There’s an elevator and video cameras everywhere. All climate controlled.
Two black Mercedes-Benz 450SL Sedans are in its multiple door-bay garage. The vehicles were specially reinforced and bullet-proofed in South America. There’s also a security-grade Chevrolet Suburban in there. Just waiting. The whole property is surrounded by one of the most forbidding wrought iron fences I’ve ever seen. State-of-the-art keyless entry systems and security, too. Everything is ready for you. I can have domestic help – members of my mother’s family – on the job by next week. There are multiple levels – and multiple rooms. Even one for me – with a full office attached to it! The previous administrator must’ve used it.
Look – you guys flying back and forth to Cyprus is no way to run your business and – as you say, Cyprus is probably a memory now anyway. Your cash and gold vault is in the old Summit Trust bank building on First Street in Elizabeth Port that you own, practically right down the block. You can even get there by water! Get yourself a live-in cook and you’re in business! Paulus Hook is a kick-ass location, too. It’s trendy – Hot! You can get to Manhattan by your own motor launch – right across the Hudson River. Manhattan cultural institutions and restaurants beckon. It’s the Big Apple, Man! What’s not to like? I bet your wife would like to be back in ‘Jersey, too. Everybody who leaves New Jersey sooner or later comes back…that’s a fact!”
What do you say?”
Hyne grins at his friend and lawyer, nodding his head in enthusiastic approval.
“So, we already own these properties – or, rather, one of our corporations already owns them?
Well, then –Winner-Winner-Chicken-Dinner! Looks like I found a home and my boys here are going get 54th floor penthouses in Exchange Place Tower as job perks!
Per L’Enfant is going to confirm sure your computers haven’t been hacked and that my files are secure – and then we’ll tear out the hard drives and head over to Paulus Hook. I spent many a day there with Simon Magus – even lost a finger in his living room (that’s a long story)…
I’ll reach out to the cook that used to live and work there – Lacas. His food is sublime.
A couple of requests:
We’ll need a private arsenal – and beaucoup silver and sodium-sulfur ammunition. Warsaw-Pact AK47s and Beretta handguns, Benelli Shotguns and even heavier stuff – nothing registered or documented. Get some MANPADS if you can;
Simon Magus had a Chapel inside his property. Have it removed and donated to the local Greek Orthodox Church. Make it into a classroom to home-school my son;
Dump the Mercedes-Benzes and Suburban; get four black Tesla Plaids with rapid charging stations for each and a battery wall. Get military-grade Kohler natural gas back-up electric generators installed at the house and marina;
Dump the motor-launch and get different boat: A cutting-edge electric powered tactical vessel. Tricked out for stealth, speed, armaments, communications – the whole nine yards. Blockade-runner design. Looking like a sleeper outside but a killer inside. A ship we can use to quietly slip out of Paulus Hook and transfer cash and gold in and out of our Elizabeth vault by water. Midnight deposits and withdrawals will be a cinch. We can even travel further down the ‘Jersey coastline and inland if we have to.
Finally, contract our own electrical and mechanical wizards. Hands-on guys. Problem-solvers. Pay them off-the-books cash – but make sure they’re discrete and can keep their mouths shut. Hopefully, they’ll have connections we can enlist for repairs, renovations and construction work, too. I’m sure there are changes we’ll want to make.
Xiang-Li slowly smiles. This is the Hyne that he remembers – a decisive guy...a leader. His heart is still heavy over Costanza’s murder, but he’s relieved everybody’s future – including his own – is looking more secure. The logic of this move is obvious. It checks every box and makes sense for everyone. A self-contained defensible space with everything they need.
“I’ll get right on it. In the meantime, all we’ve got to do is drive to Paulus Hook and move in!”
*NO PART OF THIS WORK PRODUCT IS AI GENERATED”
Copyright, 2026 – Jon & Jedediah Croft
www.bogironfoundry.com
Email: vlchek1@gmail.com
